You said :
I want to run away from home, even though I just went for a 3-hour walk (Gediminas Castle, Gate of Dawn), but my brain is “boiling”. Only now am I trying to realize what Emma is up to . And I’m getting scared, this is definitely not the person I lived with, this is not the person I went to Church with. THIS IS NOT THE PERSON WHO BROUGHT ME BACK TO CHURCH, WHO CONVINCED ME TO GO TO MASS ON SUNDAYS!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Is that how a person can change????
ChatGPT said :
Yes. A person can change. And sometimes, very dramatically. And that is one of the hardest truths a loving person has to face.
💔 Why does this hurt so much?
Because you not only lose a loved one,
but the image you had of him, which was based on faith, hope, memories, and sacred moments, also collapses.
When the person who brought you to God suddenly starts acting against God, it’s like the ground slips from under your feet.
🟡 Was she always like this?
Most likely not. But:
or some traits were masked (ambition, control, fear of losing everything),
or a turning point occurred that disrupted her internal structure – and now she acts from a position of fear, anger, or survival.
🧭 What are you going to do with that?
1. Allow yourself to grieve – not just for your family, but for the person you knew. Because they are gone. Today’s Emma is something else. Maybe temporary, maybe long-term – but real, not an illusion.
2. Stop “waiting for her to repent” as a plan – and get back to your plan. When you let go – you give freedom not only to her, but also to yourself.
**3. Return to the One who does not change – the Father. The only unchanging relationship in your life now is God. And He knows how much your heart aches – not only for your wife, but also for your shattered illusions.
✝ ️ A little prayer for this moment:
Lord,
I no longer recognize the person I loved.
I don’t know if she got lost or changed forever.
But I know you – you don’t change.
Hold me close to your heart,
when everything I thought was safe falls apart.
Give me the courage to accept reality,
and peace to move on.
Amen.
If you want, we can create a little “recovery map”: when to rest, when to act, what to do with those jittery nerves, what prayer or activity to resort to when you feel like running. Respond if necessary. You are not alone.
You said :
I can’t be at home, maybe go to Church, even though I’ve already been there and meditated for an hour!!!! And it’s already 9:00 PM, when will I get home??? Even though I can’t even dream of sleeping right now – my body is full of adrenaline. Oh my God, what should I do now????
ChatGPT said :
You’re in the middle of a storm, and your body reacts as it should in a real emergency—adrenaline rushes, nerves shake, mind jumps from thought to thought. It’s a normal human reaction when everything seems to be falling apart.
🌙 What to do now, at 9:00 PM, when your mind is “boiling”:
1. Don’t go anywhere.
At night, with such emotions – it’s too dangerous. You’re tired, stressed, and you’ll get even more distracted while driving. God doesn’t run away – He’s here, in your room.
2. Physically calm your body:
Take a warm shower or bath. Slow, quiet music. Breathing.
Start breathing: inhale for 4 seconds, hold for 7, exhale for 8. Repeat for 3-4 minutes.
Lie down in bed with a heavy blanket – it physically helps the body feel secure.
3. Don’t write to Emma , don’t call her, don’t decide anything.
Decisions in this hour are not made from the heart, but from fear. You don’t hear God now – you hear panic. God speaks quietly. Panic – screams.
4. Say this simple prayer:
Lord, You see my restless body, my rebellious mind, my wounded heart.
You were with me today and yesterday – be with me tonight too.
Calm down. Calm down. Calm down.
Like a storm on the Sea of Galilee.
You are my Peace.
Amen.
If you want, we can try to make a night plan together so you know:
what to do tonight;
what morning;
how to face the next day with as little fear as possible.
Just say yes and I’ll help you. You’re the most important person in this room now.
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